And wine
that maketh glad the heart of man, and oil
to make his face to shine, and bread which strengtheneth man's heart.
Psalm 104:15
I staggered, looking for the wine,
A bottle of chemical joy, the oil
That lubricates the mind and breaks the
heart.
My heart was crusty and cold;
My heart could not relent;
Wine was my desperate need.
Get a grip, I told myself, you don't
need
A crutch, a prop, that's the wine.
The cloud of doom can hover,
unrelenting,
And malice pressurize like unclaimed
oil,
I have no quarrel with the cold,
And what lasts longer than a dehydrated
heart?
I petted myself, pleased with my
heartlessness.
I was proud because I did not need
Wine nor oil to keep out the cold.
There was vinegar instead of wine,
And barrels empty of oil.
I kept myself closed, and would not
relent.
Though starving and dry, I would not
relent,
Chopped and dusty, pieces of my heart
Chafed, longing to be oiled.
The bitterest heart owns the bitterest
need,
The need for new wine,
A thaw to dissolve the coldness.
Strangely, a flicker of heat endured
the cold,
A flicker that softly pressed me to
relent.
Though half-choked, I begged the Lord
for wine,
Wine to make glad my cheerless heart.
The tiny light illuminated my need.
Pour out, pour out on me the oil!
He poured out on me rivers of oil
That soaked into the crevices of
coldness.
He loosed to me utter joy in my need.
He whispered, repent and relent.
Good God, I feel the flesh of my heart
Refreshed, soaked with new wine!
Oil of gladness covered me when I
relented.
The cold, deadened organ reddened to a
beating heart.
In my need, I drank the best wine.
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