Empowered... But Somehow Emptier

Urgh! I am sick of watching shows and reading books about women becoming empowered. I need to figure out why this bothers me so much. Read on for a little (poorly done) psychoanalysis.

I started thinking about this while I and my siblings sang songs from The Little Mermaid last week. The hidden message in The Little Mermaid is obviously female empowerment. (I would say the empowerment of women, but I don't think a mermaid is a woman.) Think about these lines: "Betcha on land, they understand, and they don't reprimand their daughters/Bright young women/Sick of swimmin'/Ready to stand." It was Ariel's choice to become human, and she did it, despite her father's command to stay in the sea.

Then, while I was sitting here trying to think of a good topic for this post, I started watching a movie on Hallmark. In this movie, Mrs. Washington Goes to Smith, the lead character is a woman in mid-life, going back to college. Mrs. Washington asks her roommate, a 20-year old character, for advice about dating. "Don't be passive," Zoe tells her, "Don't wait for him to call, call him. Be persistent." Which, of course, Mrs. Washington goes out and does, which lands her a man and allows her to dump her philandering husband.

Why does this rub me the wrong way? I guess because the more empowered women get, the more passive men seem to be. It is backwards from what really works. Do men like it when women pursue them? Do women like pursuing men? Is it a good idea for young ladies to ignore the advice of their fathers? Would the world be better off if women were more like men, and men were more like women?

I don't think so.

I appreciate men who treat me like a lady, not like another dude. When they open the door for me, it makes me happy. When they ask if they can carry my stuff, I almost always say yes.

I somehow think that the reverse is true as well. I bet men appreciate ladies who act like ladies, not like men. I bet they would like it if we allowed them to make decisions for themselves. I bet they would like it if we asked them for advice, then heeded it.

If you think my ideas are totally sexist, ask yourself why. Ask yourself if your way of thinking holds up in reality. Ask yourself if you have been brainwashed into this whole female empowerment bit.

And lighten up. At least you're not a mermaid who sold your voice to an octopus witch.